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 Pre-Marital Sex 
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Post Pre-Marital Sex • Posted: Tue Oct 26, 2010 8:58 pm
I've juggled with introducing this topic for quite some time, and by quite some time I literally mean over a year. Mostly I was uncertain due to the varying ages of our members here, but honestly who here had no sweet clue 'what sex was' when you were in Middle School? I attest that any member allowed on the site by permission of a parent are well aware what things to probably not look at. So I'll set the grounds, if you don't like this kind of talk then stop reading and look somewhere else. After all, this is the Seriously Serious board and everything here is serious.

I also wasn't sure as to how upper management or fellow management really stood on having this 'serious' of a topic arise. In my honest opinion, I find discussion about life and death, religion, and politics to be an even more mature topic than this one. Well, somewhat. Either way, let us get cracking.

First off I have to ask you guys to keep in line with the rules of this board and above all else keep crude jokes or remarks to yourselves. I also ask that if you MUST mention any thing about a sex life... keep the details to yourselves, cool? Cool. :P I will heavily moderate and (very likely) discuss this subject with whoever wishes to post here.

The end all of a subject like this is me asking you what your stance is on Pre-Marital sex, are you for, against, undecided, or don't necessarily give three *Navi*s and a penny? Of course it's expected you elaborate your choice 0_0

I shall begin: I find it difficult to define my opinion on the whole Pre-Marital sex thing. Overall I will make this short and express that I am not against it in the expression of unifying an already serious relationship. I see no reason to have to be married for sex to finally become something that is not a taboo, why we see marriage as the first rule for this kind of action simply comes down to a few tried and true societal ideals. Sex of course has its consequences, we are all aware of this from the repeated lessons taught to us through our developmental stages of life. Marriage is seen as a safehaven due to the (usually true) fact that you are financially and emotionally mature enough to raise the next generation of the species.

To put it quickly, one of the main purposes we even exist is to continue on our lines and to produce a generation superior to the one we are in. I don't really think I'd find someone who would disagree with that: the mass majority of the animal kingdom happens to agree with us. Marriage has also been handled as the only acceptable time to have this kind of 'relation' with another person due to its inclusion in religious groups that hold the idea that Pre-Marital Sex is a heinous crime and is, in some cases, punishable by death.

But we have a religion topic, so I'll stop there. Point is, Marriage is seen as the norm (still) for when sex is observed as an acceptable activity. Recall that my views on Pre-Marital Sex being 'okay' is conditional. If the persons involved are emotionally mature and willing to accept any consequence that may arise (such as failed 'Safe Sex'), then it is up to them what is 'right or wrong' about what they do in their private lives. Truly, being 'married' is as simple as acquiring the license and signing a bunch of papers, the ceremony is just that, a ceremony. You are still the same people afterward, you just have a different title to refer to each other as.

I do not, however, find Pre-Marital Sex an 'okay' thing when it comes down to say Middle School level students partaking in it, or for those 'mature' high school students to treat it as an initiation into being 'cool' and 'awesome'. I do not think that Pre-Marital Sex is an issue that needs to be regulated, but those politicians and schoolboards certainly try their hardest. However at the same time, I feel like it might be in our best interest to continue to try to curb the sexual appetities of teenagers (the sexual deviants we are... I guess? Not that curbing it will get very far... :P yay optimism...), since, at least from my experiences in high school, no one is truly 'mature' enough for a very long time.

I realize I might have been wordy and included a lot of generalizations, I apologize, creating this was yet another spur of the moment sort of thing. I might edit... I probably won't. Either way I repeat my stance: Pre-Marital Sex is not taboo to me under the conditions that it involves two emotionally mature and responsible people. You have no idea how many friends have had their lives 'ruined' by unplanned children as early on as Grade 9.

But I will say... when in doubt: keep it in your pants :mat:

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Post Re: Pre-Marital Sex • Posted: Tue Oct 26, 2010 10:06 pm
Ah yes. This one happens to be a simple one to explain my views on.


I. Don't. Care.


At least, I don't care about the practice. We are human, we have instincts. We procreate, that's what we are made for. I don't mind who does it at any point in time, as long as they aren't complete morons.

The practice is fine, although I find that there are those that abuse this, and those are the kinds of people that end up on 'Maury' or 'Jerry Springer'. Those shows make me cringe.

I just don't see why you would risk having a child with someone if you aren't completely sure your partner will still be around to help take care of it...


I have a sliver of hope left for humanity.....mind you, I wouldn't mind people stopped recreational sex altogether...it might help our Poverty rates and help keep the god danged populations DOWN!


Ugh...I might post more info at another time...my head hurts....


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Post Re: Pre-Marital Sex • Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 6:27 am
I do care. Some might not like how much I care, but whatever. And, I could just say that the Bible says that's its wrong, but just leaving you with that wouldn't be the brightest idea. The question really is, why is it wrong?

Socially, sex is destructed outside of marriage. Let's say a mature couple (as ZE brought up) had sexual relations, let's then say, they broke up but the woman has a kid. Even if the father provides for that kid, how would that kid react to having the knowledge out of wedlock? Some would have anger problems, others depression, some would do what their parents did, but even moreso (or the same amount). No, it doesn't always happen, but the possibilities are more than likely greater. (note, no research, or at least none recently enough to really remember where it's from. And I understand that these couples might get married after they find out the woman is pregnant, but that's not the point here.)

Now, for high schoolers and middle schoolers and less mature individuals it could lead them to have sexual transmitted diseases or kids before they're ready to. And how would that disease effect them? They could die, spread it to someone else, be unable to have kids, or many other problems. What would having a kid do? That kid would be likely to act the same way their parents did (or, at least, be ashamed of what they did) because their parents would probably not be mature enough or finically stable enough to actually support them. Yes, sometimes, people are able to get out of this mess, but wouldn't it be better to just avoid it completely and not do it? I think so.

Now, morally sex outside of marriage is wrong too. Even in a mature relationship. I'm not saying that we should stone someone for doing it (because we aren't the ancient Israelites and several other things that are more for a religious debate topic), but the Bible still says that marriage outside of wedlock (or with someone other than your spouse) is wrong and since that's the case, it is wrong. (I know, saying that there's only moral authority is so "backward", but I'm "backward", oh well.)

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Post Re: Pre-Marital Sex • Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 6:34 am
You're not really 'backward' you're just stating your views. I on the other hand don't care what people do behind closed doors. But when that door is blown wide open and the contents of the room are shoved in my face....that's when I get pissed off.

Sex is a natural occurance, however is seems that rather than its intended purpose, it's being marketed as a 'casual pass-time' or a 'fun activity'.

I am not the kind of person who believes in 'love' (at least for myself), but those who feel as though they HAVE this delusion with their partner must think through their actions accordingly. I don't understand how people link Love to Sex almost immediately. If you're in love, then both people should be able TO WAIT for one another. Any urging of Pre-Marital Sex should be a sign that your significant other might not be in it for the 'love'.

As a final note, Blarg.


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Post Re: Pre-Marital Sex • Posted: Fri Oct 29, 2010 9:24 pm
Well, when you really think about it, marriage is just a legal document. You could say going out is just being "married" alone. I think it is only because of human customs and traditions that we assume someone will be staying together forever if they are married and not if they aren't. While there's exceptions for both side and this may be a true assumption usually, there are relationships that LEAD to marriage where I think the sex could be perfectly okay, especially if they even planned on getting married. The only bad side to it is if you end up getting a consequence out of the sex like a freakin baby and then they both break up or something cuz of it. THAT'S wrong and stupid in every way. But, no break ups, no consequences, I don't see why not because the events of their lives won't be altered whether they do it sooner, or later. So as long as a couple truly does want to stay with each other, married or not, I don't see anything wrong with it. And this obviously falls into the category of doing sexual activities with people you're not even in a relationship with. Sure theoretically it might be okay if you do it constantly with strangers without consequence, but that just doesn't exist. Somewhere along the line, someone is going to get a disease, pregnant, become unhappy, become emotionally scarred, etc. As for getting away with that kind of stuff, especially for the typical idiotic teen today, would I say it's wrong? No. Not wrong, but stupid. Just plain stupid and unwise. It makes you a weak person, one who gives into his/her desires easily and makes decisions based on what they "feel". So, people who do this are not wrong in my eyes but just fools and will only be causing harm to themselves and anyone else engaging in the activity. That is all.


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Post Re: Pre-Marital Sex • Posted: Mon Nov 01, 2010 9:37 am
I'm rather in agreement with Zim.

If the couple stays together, and eventually has a child, even if they choose not to marry, as long as they stay together, that's cool.

Relationships that split due to a child, well, I have no respect for that.

Zim has a great point. Marriage isn't a concept set in stone. People get divorced every day. You make that commitment to live together forever, but most people call it off after a few years because they're sick of each other? Is there really any difference now between a marriage and any other relationship?

Now, sex, like one-night stands, and hooking up for the sake of hooking up, that's just stupid. There are even people who will just use a relationship as a pretense for getting into another's pants, so it's hard to say, 'be wary' of every single relationship.

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